Tonight I was challenged with change. There are conflicting views about whether it was a minor or major change. For the purposes of this post the degree of change is somewhat irrelevant. What I want to focus on how a person copes with change.
I think it’s fair to say that I have quite a bit on my plate just at the moment. I’m dealing with moving house, the acceptance of abuse in my past, an infant with a broken leg, financial insecurity…and probably a few more things besides. Frankly, I’m doing well to just get out of bed every morning. To add even one tiny bit of change on top of all this would be dicing with danger.
I have varying attitudes towards change generally but I would say that if an idea is a good one, has merit, is founded in some evidence, then I’m likely to be on board. But tonight when a change which affects me in a number of ways and quite often was thrown into the mix I kinda lost my bundle.
Again, not wanting to look at the specifics of what happened but think about the effect it had on me, I have reflected that my reaction was probably a little too intense and intensely personal for what was actually happening. I think it boils down to the fact that when so much stress is present in a person’s life their capacity for resilience is diminished. In my case, the elastic band was stretched to breaking point and this was the final stressor that made me snap.
I calmed down within the matter of an hour or so. I think the people around me had no idea why I was as upset as I was. Oh well. I hope they forgive me for not being my usual bouncy, elastic self.